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Crocodile Dundee once said “Seven million people all wanting to live together. New York must be the friendliest place on Earth.” And while it’s certainly not true, it’s not as much of a crock as you might think.
People here are just as nice as they are in any other city. They’re just in a little bit more of a hurry. People still smile at you and say thank you when you hold the door open for them. But there are a lot of people here; consequently there are a larger number of jerks. And jerks tend to stand out. Here are some simple common-sense ways to avoid jerky people.
- Don’t be a jerk. Smile. Be a nice guy. Everybody hates a jerk. Even jerks.
- Stay out of people’s way. A lot of people in New York are in a hurry. If they think you’re standing in their way, people have a tendency to lash out.
- Speak the truth wisely. Believe it or not, most people don’t like it told “like it is.” Especially if it’s something about them. When you speak the truth, speak with caution.
- Help people. Everybody loves an ally.
Here are some types of people who tend to be more jerk-prone than others.
- People in a hurry. Watch out around rush hour. Everyone’s pushing to get wherever they’re going.
- Drivers. The streets in New York are stressful. If you’re driving, use your horn sparingly and be patient. The sound of a horn sounds like an insult to a stressed driver. And if you’re a pedestrian, look both ways before crossing the street and look out for taxi cabs. The yellow ones don’t stop.
- Liberals. Not to say that there aren’t nice liberals or jerky conservatives out there, but a greater number of liberals tend to be angrier people. If your opinion differs from theirs, voice it with caution.
- Restaurant workers during the lunch rush. There are a lot of people they’re trying to serve in a short period of time. Don’t hold up the line and decide what you want quickly. And I hear there actually is a Soup Nazi somewhere uptown.
Here are some types of people who tend not to be jerks.
- People trying to do business with you. They can’t make a buck if you get pissed off and leave. For them jerk=no repeat business.
- Your friends. I know your friends can be jerks at times, but they mean well. And usually they care about you. If they have something negative to say about you, listen up. You probably need to hear it. As the good book says, “faithful are the wounds of a friend.”
- The cops. Despite what you may see on TV, the cops actually tend to be nice people. Got a problem? Ask a cop. Just make sure you aren’t a drug dealer or a murderer or anything.
- Kids. Kids can be real jerks sometimes, but usually just to other kids or to their parents. If you see a kid, smile. Chances are they’ll smile back.
Obviously I’m not the be-all end-all jerkauthority. If you think I’m wrong, or there’s something I left off the list, just leave a comment. Don’t believe everything you see on TV. People here are just as human as people anywhere. No more, no less.